Replace “sometime” with one possibility
“We should have coffee” can be sincere and still never become a plan. Offer a specific possibility that fits an existing routine: half an hour after school drop-off, a café near the language class, or a walk with takeaway drinks. The other person can then say whether that shape works.
Mention whether children will be there if it affects the choice of place. Check that the setting and timing are suitable for the plan you are proposing. An invitation that sounds like a quiet adult conversation may feel different when one person arrives expecting a playdate.
Keep the first meeting modest. There is no need to host a meal or organise an elaborate outing to continue a conversation you enjoyed. A clear end time can make the invitation easier to accept for someone whose day is already full.
Make a reply easy
Use a straightforward message with the useful details together. “Would you like coffee at the café beside school on Thursday after drop-off? I have about half an hour” needs little interpretation. If you are flexible, offer one alternative rather than a long list of possible dates.
If the person cannot come, respond without trying to solve their entire calendar. They may suggest another time. If they do not, you can leave the invitation open and see them at the next shared activity. A declined coffee does not give you much information about their wider interest in friendship.
Confirm the meeting briefly once it is agreed. If something changes, let them know as soon as you can and be clear about whether you are proposing a replacement or cancelling for now.
At the meeting, let it be an ordinary conversation. You do not need to find a best friend, tell the whole moving story or prove that you are settling in well. If you enjoy it, you can make another small plan. The specificity gets you to the table; the rest can develop from there.
